Application essays are a critical part of getting in the door  – from exec level jobs to medical and law schools.

 I helped a medical student achieve success with his personal essay and his extracurricular activity reports.  See the “Before” and “After” below!

 

Essay Before:

MORE THAN AN INTERN

She had never been more scared in her life. Why now, after all these years, did it have to return? To her it was only muscle weakness and an occasional sharp pain that lingered in her sides with each breath she took. Her thoughts raced and her questions slurred together, fueled by the fear of the worst case scenario. As he approached, she asked me to take her daughter outside to play.

Essay After:

MORE THAN AN INTERNSHIP

She had never been more frightened. Why now, after all these years, had it returned?  The muscle weakness and sharp pain in her sides lingered with each breath. So many questions and cold fear ran through her mind – would it be the worst-case scenario?  As the Emergency Department resident approached us, she asked me to take her daughter outside to play.

Read both essays side by side: AnthonyPersonalEssay_BA_FNL

 

Summary of Extracurricular / Before

Clinical Volunteer at Arizona Global Health Project – ASU

As part of my initiative to medically serve those in impoverished areas, I joined AZGHP. As a volunteer with Spanish fluency at an elementary level, I assisted in triage and an assistant to the providers. I gave intramuscular steroid injections on pinched rotator cuffs and as a former athlete provided demonstrations of stretches for physical therapy needs.

Summary of Extracurricular / After

My desire to help those most in need inspired me to join AZGHP, traveling to Central America as a volunteer with knowledge of basic Spanish. I assisted in triage, giving intramuscular steroid injections on pinched rotator cuffs and using my athletic experience to demonstrate physical therapy stretches.

Read the Before/After side by side: MedSchoolApp_BA